There are certain rules we follow . . . as humans, as PCVs, and certainly as expats in a very hot climate. I don't generally embrace rules. No poster child for Rule-Follower is this PCV from Pô. Yet common sense (or vanity) dictates that some rules were indeed intended to be followed. Always. We try to avoid classic blunders by following said rules. We were raised from childhood with these rules, either by society as a whole, or by our families, friends, teachers. For instance, as stated to Wesley in The Princess Bride:

You only think I guessed wrong. That’s what so funny. I switched glasses while your back was turned. Ha-ha, you fool. You fell victim to one of the classic blunders. The most famous is never get involved in a land war in Asia; but only slightly less well-known is this: never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line.

Me, I was raised on just a few simple rules:

No patent leather before Easter;
No white after Labor Day;
Never leave the house without lipstick;
A lady never walks with a cigarette;
And never eat anything containing mayonnaise at a summer picnic. It’s the heat. Makes the mayo go bad. Turns it into a playground for bacteria.

But here in The B.F. the mayo requires no refrigeration after opening, and it keeps for months on the shelf. Months! Something’s very wrong with that. Makes you wonder about why type of chemical can stop all that bacterial playground fun. Whatever . . . I'm not taking chances and will continue to avoid any mayo that doesn't require refrigeration . . . especially in a land that's hot like Mexico. Maybe my next PCV assignment will take me to Finland, where I'll again enjoy tuna salad.

I’m reading The Bell Jar. You'll recall that Esther and 10 of her friends are violently ill after eating crab-stuffed avocado at their luncheon. It was the mayonnaise. I guarantee. Didn’t Mrs. Greenwood ever teach her daughter the mayonnaise rule? Pauvre petite Elly . . . what trouble might have been spared with that one simple mayo rule?  And am I the last person on the planet to read any Sylvia Plath? Do they have PCVs in Finland? We can only speculate.